MUSUME | Dallas

Something to talk about…

One day at lunch, my sister (architectural designer), my father in-law (restaurateur), and I (humble ad-man) started talking. Andrea riffed an idea to play some cheeky, spoken-word translations in Musume’s restaurant bathrooms. Josh loved it, but he wanted to turn the dial up from cheeky to… provocative, chilling, and eventually just absurd. I ran with it.

With the help of the restaurant staff, who threw in a few suggestions, I wrote, translated, and produced close to 200 English to Japanese translations.

Now, anyone who visits the bathrooms at Musume returns to their table with a little something to talk about over their sushi.

 

Let’s dance, hot stuff.

You are getting sleepy.

I can see perfectly in the dark.

I think someone is following me.

Your pupils are dilating.

Let’s get a room.

Sake shows true feelings.

You come here often?

I took my drugs in the wrong order.

You can’t eat a painted cake.

You gotta unzip me.

How long can you hold your breath?

Marry me?

Let’s talk sushi.

I’ll call the butler.

Do you want to sleep with me?

The spicy edamame has the sauce!

I wonder what was in those pills?

Don’t wake up my dad.

Is that a syringe in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Order for the table.

You be the mouse, I’ll be the cat.

Dead men tell no tales.

Have you seen Succession?

What’s in the box?

You seem tense. 

How about a massage?

Give in to the groove.

Buy the ticket. Take the ride.

I’ll have the unusual.

Money can’t buy happiness. But it can buy mushrooms.

There’s luck in the last helping.

Nice shoes.

You know, because of the implication.

Do you want to split the check?

This is ham. Soaked in rum.

I lied on my dating profile.

Yuki dreams of sushi.

The skin you’re in would make a lovely suit.

You’re good at that.

Fear is a powerful motivator.

A sushi a day keeps the monsters at bay.

Roll it up.

Would you like to play a game?

What’s up, gorgeous?

My parents are going to hate you.

I drink your milkshake.

Good news or bad news?

You’ll catch more bees with chopsticks.

I don’t know enough about science to dispute it.

Reality rarely lives up to imagination.

Of course this is a safe space.

How fast can you run?

It always starts with a foot massage.

Tips are appreciated.

Your mother was a terribly attractive woman.

Who’s catfishing who?

Khalil, can you please order for the table?

Should have swiped left.

These pretzels are making me thirsty.

Those earrings look expensive.

The Uber is here.

I’ve been watching you. 

Are you ready for dessert?

Let them eat crab cake.

Two bodies. Same heart.

Thank God for the Black Cod.

Leave it running.

Who’s texting you?

How about a cold shower?

Let’s skip to Akai.

Meet me in the bathroom.

Take a deep breath.

What’s your safety word?

Sake is the best medicine.

Are you allergic to shellfish?

I have a new knot I want to try out.

Smells like opportunity.

This must be the place.

It be like that sometimes.

Paint me like one of your french girls.

What are all those bits of paper in your beer?

I have a strict “no smalltalk” policy.

I prefer pineapple on my pizza.

Am I original?

I accidentally ate the gift receipt.

Do you need a ride home?

Nope.

What if God was one of us?

You are not a cheap date.

Plot twist.

Let’s leave through the back.

 I don’t belong here.

Bless your heart.

Oh, you read the book, huh?

I found you on Hinge.

What does that tattoo mean?

Luck is not a business model.

Dumplings over flowers.

Want to play with my Ouija board?

Substance over style.

Eat it raw.

Birds of a feather fly together.

You look ticklish.

Why did you block me?

Close your eyes. 

Open your mind.

I’m not even sorry.

I want my $2!

Pick your poison.

Your body is a wonderland.

Enjoy the ride.

So you think you can dance?

I’m on a sushi boat.

I’m having a panic attack.

Prestige Worldwide!

Are you feeling lucky?

My psychic said I would meet you.

Run.

There ain’t no such thing as halfway crooks.

“Musume” means “Daughter” in Japanese.

Meet me in the coat closet. 

Let’s get out of here.

That’s cheeky. 

Drug tested. Drug approved. 

I’m listening. 

I never forget a face. 

Can you do me a favor?

If looks could kill…

Be careful, it’s sharp. 

We like what we see. 

Guilty as charged.

Can I get a side of spicy mayo?

That’s a lot of duct tape.

I moonlight as a camgirl.

Put this on your podcast.

Musume is my favorite restaurant.

Sake is to rice, what wine is to grapes.

What’s your favorite scary movie?

Will the Cowboys ever get to the Super Bowl?

It’s hotter in Dallas.

That’s a banger.

I knew you were trouble when you walked in.

Eat more sushi!

Let me show you how to use chopsticks.

You have something in your teeth.

Excuse me, I have to take this.

What’s your finest Japanese Whisky?

What’s your name again?

Can I get your number?

These boots are made for walking.

Titanic? That’s my icebreaker.

Picture it: You, me, and a bottle of sake.

Coffee, tea, or sushi?

What’s your favorite murder?

Dinner? Or straight to dessert?

I think that’s my ex.

Do you know CPR?

Today is national “flirt with a stranger” day.

It’s a full moon tonight.

Let’s have a picnic in a cemetery.

My eyes are hungrier than my stomach.

We built this city on sushi rolls.

You give online dating a bad name.

I’ve got two tickets to paradise.

Are you asthma? Because you take my breath away.

This happened in my dream last night.

Stacy’s mom has got it going on.

I eat my sashimi at night.

I prefer cold sake over hot.

Let’s do a shot.

Elliott makes the best Goat Cheese Salad.

I miss Kenichi.

Eddie is my favorite bartender.

Death by sushi.

We are two edamames in a pod.

None of this is real.

What’s your fantasy?

I’m salty like seaweed.

I receive this food.